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What To Do If You Meet a Cougar

Not all predators are found in the wild. Some lurk in the urban jungle and are just as dangerous. They are older (over 40) and yes, they prey on our young.

Urban Cougars
The accepted definition of an Urban Cougar is an over 40 year’s old woman who tries and sometimes succeeds in dating younger men. They see themselves as young-at-heart and younger than their actual years. The difference between a wild cougar and an urban one is large and small at the same time. The wild cougar is usually defending her territory, her young or is just hungry. The Urban cougar, while defending her territory as well, wants our young and her appetite is insatiable.

Their Prey
They feed on youth. It is not only desirable but imperative for their ego, image and sexual appetite to devour our young. Be warned: they are not looking for love. They go for the kill purely for enjoyment and conquest, leaving their prey scattered around for others to pick up the pieces.

Their Territory
For those of you who trudge through the urban jungle,; beware of bars, nightclubs, restaurants and anywhere that serves high end drinks and overpriced meals. Health clubs and jogging trails are another danger area as they have been known to prey on the fit, the athletic and the good-looking of our young men. Though they can be found lurking even in the local supermarket, the nightclub is their main feeding ground.

Their Methods
Much like a human hunter, the urban cougar may use bait as an enticement. This includes alcohol by buying the unsuspecting young male multiple rounds of drinks. They also entice their prey into their clutches with cleavage, tight fitting clothing, shiny jewelry and dyed hair.

Beware the Cougar Pack
Yes they run in packs. Though they are singular in their desires, they tend to hunt in packs of 3 or more at times. Usually ensconced at the bar of any high end establishment, they will spot their prey immediately and a sort of pecking order commences. Cougars in their forties are attracted to men in their 20s, Cougars in their fifties may go after thirty something year-olds, though their preferred prey is also much younger. While in the pack the fifty-plus year old will defer to the forty year old when pursuing a very young victim, if encountered on their own, all bets are off.

Protect Yourself
Dating in your own age group is a good start. Dating in your own economic level helps as well since most cougars are better off then you and may use this difference in spending to lure you in. Purchasing that drink is just a start. Before you know it you’ll have a new wardrobe, a new hairstyle and will be eating at much better restaurants. Avoiding their compliments, belching a lot and responding with, “Yes Ma’am,” seems to ward them off. You may feel complimented by their stalking at first, but they only want to devour you. It maybe for a week or a few months but usually it’s just for the night.

Protect Your Friends
Friendly ribbing helps. Jokes about dating a GMLF are highly effective. Never leave your friend alone with a cougar or alone at a high end steak house bar for that matter. Before you know it, the drinks start getting bought, the cleavage becomes more visible and the stroking of the young male ego begins. These are wily creature, way more experienced, especially in their nightclub habitat. A good wingman would always get between his friend and a cougar, and just by doing so, can disrupt her attack. Look them in the eye and slowly walk away. If that doesn’t work, whip out the “Yes Ma’ams” and the “No Ma’ams enough and they will hopefully become either too discouraged or will find younger, less experienced prey.

rawr

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