Daniel Martin

The Seven Best Sports to Play While Naked

The ancient Greeks didn’t get everything right, but they were pretty close. We can thank them for geometry, drama, some cool architecture and even cooler mythology. While these things are all fine and dandy, perhaps their greatest legacy is the idea of competing in competitions in the buff, which dates back until at least 776 BC, when the first Olympics was held.

At these games, competitors would rub their bodies down with olive oil before competing in a number of different events, such as running, chariot racing, wrestling and the javelin throw, all of which were meant to celebrate the achievements of the human body. The Olympics were held in this fashion for nearly 12 centuries until some buzzkill emperor decided the festival was a pagan cult and banned it outright.

We think it’s about time to reinstate the art of competing in your birthday suit, so here are the seven sports that seem as if they could only get better if they were played in the nude.

Biking
Okay so this is already kind of a thing, but it would’ve made the list either way because honestly, what could be better than feeling the wind in your, uh, hair while with a bunch of other naked people? This is the idea behind the World Naked Bike Ride, which occurs in cities all over the world each summer and encourages participants to strip down and pedal through town to protest our increasing dependence on oil and other non-renewable energy sources.

Skydiving
C’mon, I know you were thinking the same: the only thing that could improve this high octane sport is a dash of nudity. But you don’t take my word for it – try asking Italian supermodel Roberta Mancino whose affinity for jumping out of planes in the buff is no secret. Mancino has completed over 7000 dives, many of them nude, ushering in what will surely become known as the golden era of parachuting.

Skiing/Snowboarding
While skiing and snowboarding might not be the most… flattering of sports to participate in naked, this hasn’t stopped a host of people from going ahead and doing it anyway. For the most part, if hitting the slopes au naturel is your thing, you’ll probably have to be discreet about it, although some ski resorts have hosted naked ski days on the last day of the season in the past. One such example was Crested Butte in Colorado, who ran the event for years until it became so popular that they had to shut it down in the 90’s.

Surfing
Surfers are pretty much sexy by definition, but when they doff their wetsuits for their birthday suits, they take it to a whole other level. Compare to the other sports on this list, surfing in the nude is pretty well established and not without reason. The grittiness of surf wax aside, letting it all hang out while you hang 10 has to be pretty liberating. If nothing else, it’s a great way to get rid of those horrible tan lines.

Golf
Yeah, that’s right: golf. There’s really no reason that golf would be particularly fun in the nude, but it would sure be a great way to liven things up for what is undoubtedly the most excruciatingly boring spectator sport in history. PGA, take note.

Hockey
Actually, on second thought naked hockey seems like a terrible idea.

E-Sports
While there is some debate as to whether or not video games actually qualify as a sport, suffice it to say, they would be greatly improved if the gamers were pwning n00bz in the nude. This would probably be a relatively easy transition to make too, as I’m willing to bet half of online gamers are already naked, right now, at this exact moment. I can’t say I blame them.

Six Awesome Skate Scenes Around the World

Since its inception as a sport in California sometime in the 1950s, skateboarding has become a global phenomenon, exported from the United States to the farthest corners of the world. Some countries have been slower on the uptake than others, for reasons ranging from prohibitive social norms to devastating wars, but in the face of all this adversity many small, tightknit skateboarding communities have managed to thrive and show that skateboarding is more than just a way to pass an afternoon, it’s also an important factor in bringing about positive social change.

Cuba
While skateboarding is not officially recognized as a sport by the Castro regime, the scene has nonetheless managed to grow despite all efforts at suppressing the burgeoning skate culture over the years. The sport arrived on the island with emissaries and soldiers from the Soviet Union back in the late 70s and remained a relatively niche phenomenon until the 2000s, when skate-based charities like Amigo and Cuba skate began bringing skateboarding gear to the island. This foreign support was the key to the scene’s growth (Cuba still does not have its own skate shop) during the US embargo, but now that US-Cuba tensions are beginning to ease, Cuba may be slated to become the next major skate destination in the Western hemisphere thanks to these well established roots.

Afghanistan
Afghanistan has been a battleground for 40 years now, the country torn apart by various proxy wars and its own internal feuding. An unlikely place for a skate culture to grow perhaps, but nevertheless this is exactly what has happened. It began with an Australian skateboarder who arrived in the country in 2007 with a couple of decks and a drive to improve the lives of local children. Unbeknownst to this Aussie at the time, this was the beginning of Skateistan, an NGO responsible for building two schools in the country (complete with skate parks) and helping to empower young girls by way of a deck and four wheels.

Ethiopia
In a vacant parking lot just down the road from the Vatican embassy in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia’s capital, it’s not uncommon to hear a wild commotion in the afternoons and on the weekends. This non-descript spot, you see, has become the de facto meeting spot for the Addis Ababa skate scene, who rendezvous here for skate outings and to distribute new gear to skaters in need through a grassroots organization called Ethiopia skate. The country is no stranger to hardship, with wars and famines defining a significant part of its 20th century history, and as such its skate scene is relatively new. But if the photos and videos coming out of the country are any indication, Ethiopia is well on its way to becoming the skate capital of the African continent.

Iran
Like Cuba, the sanctions on Western goods in Iran have made it difficult for Iranians to adopt skateboarding. Reports from the country count around one hundred skateboarders in Tehran, a woefully small number for a country of nearly 80 million people, a result of the difficulty of importing decks and various skateboard parts from the West. This hasn’t stopped Iranian skaters however, some of whom have turned to making and distributing their own decks, a process that was vividly captured in the VisualTraveling minidoc series, which documents skateboard cultures around the world.

North Korea
A country infamous for its secrecy, the cult-like status of its head of state, and the brutal measures brought against anyone who dares to dissent, North Korea seems like the last place on earth where an activity with such anti-establishment origins would be allowed to thrive. Yet in 2012, the first skate park was unveiled in Pyongyang, which either suggests that the country is loosening its stranglehold on all things even remotely Western or was simply trying to create another convenience for foreign tourists. Given the media blackout, it’s tough to say just what the skate scene in North Korea is like, but at least we know that it exists (probably).

Turkey
Istanbul, Turkey’s capital, is truly a global crossroads. It’s where East meets West, and the melding of these two forces is all too apparent in the city’s vibrant skate scene. In addition to being heavily influenced by the Western brand culture, Turkey has given birth to a number of its own skateboarding brands, crews and shops, making it a scene that truly stands alone in its unique adoption of the best elements from foreign and local skates scenes.

You’re Not Extreme Enough for These 6 Sports

What does it mean to be extreme? This is a question which has puzzled some of the greatest minds to have graced the Earth. From Socrates to Einstein, many have tried to define the essence of the extreme and many have failed in their pursuit.

But despair not, dear reader. Outdoor Tech comes bearing glad tidings, for the essence of extremeness has at last been divined! It cannot be reduced to a mere definition, but must be revealed in action. It is for this reason we present to you these 6 sports, each of which perfectly captures what it means to be extreme.

Chessboxing
That’s right: chessboxing. Created by a Dutch performance artist in the early 2000’s, chessboxing is pretty much exactly what it sounds like: a hybrid sport which combines the mental finesse of chess with the physical demands of boxing to create what may very well be the most extreme sport ever. Each chessboxing match consists of 11 3-minute rounds, which alternate between chess and boxing. Competitors win by either knockout or checkmate. Bet you wish you hadn’t given the high school chess club so much grief now, huh?

Space Diving
You probably first heard of space diving when Felix Baumgartner set a skydiving world record by jumping out of a balloon at 127,000 feet as part of the Red Bull Stratos project. As it turns out however, space diving has been around since 1960, when Air Force captain and all around badass Joseph Kittinger jumped from a weather balloon at 102,000 feet and reached speeds over 600 mph on his descent to earth. His record stood for 52 years until it was broken by Baumgartner in 2012. Best part about this? Kittinger served as the Stratos capsule communicator and was there to meet Baumgartner when he landed.

Tar Barrels
Calling ‘Tar Barrels’ a sport might be a bit of a stretch, but it is pretty extreme. What happens is every November 5, a bunch of Englishmen get together in Ottery St. Mary to run up and down the streets while carrying flaming barrels of tar on their backs. It’s less about competition than being able to prove that you’re willing to do something that no sane person would agree to.  Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Nobody knows why this tradition came about really (some claim ties to the famous gunpowder plot of 1605), but the folks of Ottery will defend to their death the right to do it.

Volcano Surfing
Again, here’s a sport which doesn’t need much explaining. The basic idea is this: find a volcano, hike to the top, strap a modified snowboard to your feet and proceed to shred some obsidian. The sport was dreamt up by National Geographic journalist and transhumanist presidential candidate Zoltan Istvan when he was 21 years old on a solo sailing journey around the world.  According to him, there’s two ways to go about it. You can take the easy way out and carve up an inactive volcano. Or you can really earn some respect by surfing an active volcano… just watch out for the molten lava. And ash that cuts like glass. And the cliffs. And the poisonous gasses. Don’t worry—I’m sure you’ll be fine.

Extreme Ironing
This is a sport that requires very little investment to get into. All you need is an iron, some wrinkled laundry, a sense of humor, and poor judgment. All good to go? Okay, now go find the most dangerous locale you can think of and start getting rid of those creases. Created by an Englishman in the late 90s, Extreme Ironing is half joke and half serious. It’s gained something of a cult following in the last decade, with enthusiasts taking their board everywhere from war zones to the top of moving cars to the bottom of the ocean.

Bull Surfing
What better way to celebrate a successful harvest than by strapping yourself behind a bull and surfing through some paddy fields? According to the opinion of the residents of Kerala, India, there is no better way. Each year, the villagers come out at the end of August to watch dozens of their closest friends stand on a board that is yoked to two bulls and proceed to surf (okay, that’s a euphemism, ‘dragged’ is probably more accurate) through ankle deep water in their fields. While you can’t really ‘lose’ at this sport, it’s safe to say that everyone who participates in something as awesome as Bull Surfing can be called a winner.